Introducing we’re {not} having a baby! Central Maine

Hello and welcome to our BDN blog, we’re {not} having a baby! Central Maine. This blog is the brainchild of Amy & Lance Blackstone, a childfree couple, married since 1995 and living in Bangor since 2003.

Amy is Associate Professor and Chair of Sociology at UMaine where, among other pursuits, she conducts research on the childfree. Lance’s day job involves business analysis – and wishing he didn’t have a day job. He enjoys all things tropical, in particular, snorkeling and scuba diving on tropical islands and, when not on a tropical island, propagating coral in his home reef aquariums. He’s a bit snarky and likes to channel his inner Andy Rooney. Together, we offer musings {sometimes sociological, sometimes snarky, always entertaining} on the childfree life.

About Us photo

If you aren’t childfree yourself, you maybe asking “What is this childfree thing of which you speak?” Good question! The term childfree is defined as people who have made the intentional and explicit choice not to have children. This is different from, say people who…

  • wish they could have children but can’t, a.k.a., childless people
  • are planning to have children but don’t have them yet
  • are undecided

Now that you know what childfree means, the next question you’ll be asking is something along the lines of “Why should I care?” Another good question! One reason you should care is that the childfree are a growing demographic. More and more people are making the conscious choice not to have children – rates of childlessness* in the US have doubled from 10% to 20% since 1976. Knowing the demographics lets us talk about possible consequences, both good and bad. We think the consequences are pretty much all good…at least for now. But that’s another post or seven.

Why you should care does not end with the demographic data. Research shows that the choice to be childfree has consequences for the chooser.  For example, one study showed that the childfree are perceived as emotionally unstable and maladjusted. Another study found that the childless (including childfree) are viewed as emotionally troubled and less warm than parents. A third study found that the childfree are viewed as selfish, cold, and materialistic.
Note that these are perceptions of the childfree, not actual facts. The facts actually show these perceptions to be false. However, given that it is highly probable that you are the friend, brother, sister, or parent of a childfree person we’re guessing that you wouldn’t characterize your friend, brother, sister, or child as “emotionally unstable”, “maladjusted”, “emotionally troubled”, “less warm than parents”, “selfish”, “cold”, or “materialistic”.

At least we guess – we hope – you wouldn’t characterize them that way just because they are childfree. 🙂

That’s a little introduction. Moving on, we hope to educate people about the childfree choice. This includes dispelling commonly held myths about the childfree. It also includes raising awareness that not having kids is a legitimate option…something that a staggering percentage of the population has never even considered. And finally, it includes giving the childfree folks out there some support; it can be surprisingly hard to be childfree.

Lance & Amy

we’re {not} having a baby! Central Maine is a…child (ahem)…of the mother blog we’re {not} having a baby!. You can also follow us on Facebook and Twitter. Heck, you can even meet up with us if you join our group were {not} having a baby! – Central Maine.

*U.S. Census Bureau data do not currently distinguish the childfree from the childless – a problem. However, the vast increase in rates of those who don’t have kids at least suggests that more people are making the choice not to have them.

Lance and Amy Blackstone

About Lance and Amy Blackstone

we’re {not} having a baby! Central Maine is the brainchild of Amy & Lance Blackstone, a childfree couple, married since 1995 and living in Bangor since 2003.